He has this way of making me feel so loved. I woke up feeling a little REJECTED, and He spoke to me through my meditation book, He and I:

“… even if all the affections of your heart were to fade away and you found yourself alone and misunderstood by everyone, I should still be your treasure, your goal, your incomparable friend, your beginning and your end. SO DON’T BE UPSET BY ANYTHING. Once and for all, place your heart in Mine, in joy as in distress.”

That was the perfect message at that moment!

Then, my daughter, Julie, pushed me to go for a run and the first song to play was, Love on Me, which has great history between me and God from a couple of years ago:

“This God wink began yesterday morning when I had an appointment with Him reading an old post entitled, ‘NIK, I WON’T LET YOU DOWN.’ To be very honest, the God maniac here was a bit anxious going into that alone time with Him, wondering if He was going to remember to help me with a certain challenge I have, and that post was exactly the reminder I needed; I got my high five from God: ‘NIK, I WON’T LET YOU DOWN.’

Fast forward later that day, we’re at the mall shopping when I saw a beautiful dress in a store I liked for my friend. I persuaded her to get it, and because she had to run to another store she wanted to give me the money to pay for the dress for her, but this friend, who is like more than ten great friends in one, I refused her money, and I went in line to pay for it. As I’m standing there waiting, I’m listening to the lyrics of the song playing in the background, and they astonishingly say:

“Girl put your love on Me
Cause I WON’T LET YOU DOWN
I WON’T LET YOU DOWN” – Love On Me by Galantis & Hook N Sling

Wink! Wink! The happiest, most blissful feeling came over me! I knew without a doubt this was God singing to me, again, saying that HE WON’T LET ME DOWN! Reading that old post that morning with the exact words in that song, out of the thousands of posts I’ve ever written, as my only appointment with God that day, and for that song, of all songs, to play for the few minutes I stood there in that line, was once again everything lining up STRANGELY a little bit too perfectly to be a coincident; it was another love song from God reminding me that I CAN trust Him.”

God has never let me down!!! Even my bad, He uses for my good, especially to bring me closer to Him. I want us with our eyes strictly on God; He’s our greatest friend. No matter the trials and tribulations that come our way, I want us NEVER LETTING GO OF GOD’S HANDS. My number one goal for the rest of this year is to get even closer than ever to Him. Even if I’m misunderstood and rejected by the entire world, I know I’m INFINITELY love by God. And that’s enough!

#GODisreallyREAL

Those are the lyrics that begin the song ‘Girls Need Love’ and EXACTLY WHERE I AM IN MY LIFE!!! Focus is the new superpower, baby! Life will try its best to distract us and have us thinking and doing the WRONG things, but I want us with our FOCUS on God, asking Him to be the Guide of our lives continually asking:

‘God, what would make You happy for me to do here in my thoughts, words, and deeds.’

Yesterday, I found myself thinking back about all sorts of craziness. It was just one little comment that got me so sad and thinking about a hurtful situation from the past. I was back to beating my head with a stick saying, ‘Nik, let’s please stay focused on happier things!’

“I am stronger than my temporary painful thoughts. I will not let myself get trapped into a destructive cycle of thinking.” — Affirmation of the day.

And all day long, I kept trying not to go down that dark road of negative thinking. But then, a late night appointment with God encouraged me:

““I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.” – Ezekiel 36:26

Before You Turn Out the Light

Trust Me to do what you cannot do: remove the little stones that mar the beauty of your heart.” – Jesus Calling

That made me so happy that God was there with me feeling my pain, but I must trust Him to take away those hurts from my heart. I wrote in my notes on my phone: “Don’t let difficulties from the past mar the beauty of your heart.” I went to bed happy.

Fast forward to today, I’m chatting with a customer, and he gives me his card and unbelievably, printed on the back are these words:

“Then I will give them one heart, and I will put a new spirit within them, and take the stony heart out of their flesh, and give them a heart of flesh.” – Ezekiel 11:19

I started crying KNOWING this was a direct message from God to me confirming His message from the night before.. No coincident! This was His way of letting me know that He’s with me and He doesn’t want me focused on past hurts and disappointments, but on HIM. And that He does not want me sad. I asked the customer why did he pick that particular verse for his cards, and he showed me there are different verses, but he always asks God that he should give the right card to the right person. In this case, he got it correct!

Let’s keep our focus on God knowing that even the bad he can use for our good. He used my PAST hurts to reveal His intimate Presence with me TODAY! God is with us!!! Let’s give Him our very best – even a smile – let us do all for His glory. Our reward is with Him!

#GODisreallyREAL

Was me having some fun with my husband after he complained that he wished I was more like a friend’s wife who was very on the ball with helping him purchase needed items. At first, I was very hurt. Especially after an evening out with the kids and my husband gave them a whole speech praising them for making the Honour Roll but made absolutely no mention of the mom who was behind the scenes dragging them to the office to study, meeting with their teachers, staying up late to study with them, having constant conversations and pushing them to be their best selves. I’m talking this long speech without congratulation the kids and not one word about me. LOL!

But like my daughter, Julie, reminded me, we get our recognition from God, not from man. I want us in every moment always trying to the best people we’re capable of being all for God’s glory. God and heaven are our audiences. Got that? I want us gong the extra mile in striving to be the best wives, husbands, mothers, fathers and people God Himself would have us to be. Let’s be God’s representatives in the world spreading His love in everything we do. God is our reward!

And I can’t get over how intimately He is involved in our lives. I consider myself my husband’s Vice-President and on a certain business issue we’ve been discussing lately, I’ve kept saying, “Slow and steady wins the race.” Like so many times I’ve said it (I’m such a nag!) because this strategy has been working for our family. So, this morning when I heard him discussing the matter with someone else, I just said to myself, I won’t discuss it again and I’ll let Mr. President do his thing. Like 30 MINUTES LATER, I’m having an appointment with God and unbelievably look what showed up:

… but remember the story of the tortoise and the hare. The tortoise, although he walked SLOWLY AND STEADILY (Wink! Wink!), reached the goal before the quick-footed hare.” – A Return To Love, Marianne Williamson

I immediately sent the pics to my husband as God confirming what I’ve been saying to him all along. Call me the crazy God maniac wife, but for this to show up was no coincident. God is still speaking to us, it’s just for us to PAY ATTENTION.

Like last summer, I kept saying to hubs on a different matter that I felt God saying to go in a certain direction with it. Again, Ms. Nag here, kept stressing him about it. Things didn’t go the way I felt it should have and based on what has since transpired, those feelings from a year ago turned out to be spot on.

HERE’S THE DEAL:

GOD KNOWS EVERYTHING. He knows the future and He knows the utmost best decision for us, but if we don’t learn His voice we sadly miss out on His guidance. God loves each of us so much, but He doesn’t force Himself on us. He patiently waits for us to acknowledge Him and invite Him to be a part of our lives. Me sitting down and having alone times with Him asking for His input in my life has been the best use of my time. I don’t regret one second praying for a closer walk with Him and sitting quietly reading spiritual books seeking to hear His voice. Let me tell ya, if you want to be the best person possible, being, SPEND TIME ALONE WITH GOD GETTING TO KNOW HIM FOR YOURSELF.

#GODisreallyREAL

That’s the name of the excellent run I did for three miles yesterday.  This life will try and get us down, but we have to keep reminding ourselves that we’re a part of God’s WINNING team. Heehaw! Despite the setbacks and challenges that want to get in our way, we can break through them or jump over them KNOWING we’re rolling with God and that there is never a moment where we lack His strength, wisdom, and guidance to tackle any and every situation:

“I look to the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord. He is the Maker of heaven and earth. He won’t let your foot slip. He who watches over you won’t get tired.” Psalm 121:1-3

The devil won’t put us to shame; we’ll put the devil to shame! So, your girl here needed a little time out running to get back focused. It’s not about how many times we fall, it’s about how many times we rise back up being BETTER than we were before the falls. Rise and shine brighter, baby!

We have God’s spirit empowering us in every moment, and these runs are my alone times with Him where I go and get recharged. “… but the Lord stood with me and strengthened me.”  It was a tough morning, and mentally, I was in a shallow place (life can do that to us sometimes!). But I threw on my sneakers, put on that I need A Win Run and I played a recorded Garnett Silk’s concert from 1994. My mood IMMEDIATELY changed when I heard these words from his song Splashing Dancing:

“O Father who art in Zion

Hear our voice, oh Jah today in our prayer

And accept our thanksgiving

Father, we thank you for all that you have done

And for what you are doing now

The Lord is I shepherd, I shall not want

He maketh me to lie in green pastures

He leadeth besides the still waters

He restoreth my soul, he restoreth my soul”

Nik, The Lord is your Shepherd, you shall not want!!! In other words, keep your focus on God because He is the supplier of ALL YOUR NEEDS, and He is taking WONDERFUL care of you despite the challenges. Your girl was HAPPY again!

Then, unbelievably right before sleeping, I heard my husband with our sons reading, and of the entire Bible I heard them say:

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want

He maketh me to lie in green pastures”

I took this as a God wink at me because this message meant so much to me earlier that day. And after sharing the story with my daughter, Julie, we go for a 5K run together today and after asking the Nike Run app to shuffle my music library of 868 songs, look what song incredibly played FIRST:

“Father we thank you for all that you have done

And for what you are doing now

The Lord is I shepherd, I shall not want

He maketh me to lie in green pastures

He leadeth besides the still waters

He restoreth my soul, he restoreth my soul” – Splashing Dancing

So, minutes after telling Julie about how much this song meant to me yesterday, God made sure that it was the first song for me to hear on today’s run. Like He was saying, ‘Just in case you didn’t get the message yesterday, Nik, RELAX, I’m taking care of you.’

This life is DIFFICULT, and you can call all of this a coincident if you want, but this is the personality of God I’m getting to know. He finds these amazing and sweet ways to remind me of His constant Presence with me. “He maketh me to lie in green pastures.” No matter the troublesome situations I know my God is with me and that He loves me unconditionally. He’s teaching me to get my recognition from Him and to give Him all recognition.

#GODisreallyREAL

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After the last EVIL experience I had with my cook, I’m scared to bring another new person in my house again. She came on a mission to destroy my home and don’t think I’m being dramatic, either. Stay alert! And stay close to God! The devil comes to kill and destroy.

And like I always tell you, feelings of stress and fear when thinking about going in a particular direction is God saying, ‘Hold up. That’s not a good idea.’ So, for now, the plan is to make moment by moment decisions waiting for God’s direction on when and whom to allow in my home again.

GOD KNOWS EVERYTHING! That’s why I say don’t play with your relationship with Him. He knows the hearts and motives of everyone. And He is ALWAYS speaking to us through our feelings. Anyone you feel uncomfortable around, watch out because God may be trying to tell you something.

I’ve been up from about 6 am washing, cooking, and cleaning. I believe God is asking us to continue carrying Jesus’ cross and whatever I have to do for the sake of keeping my family safe, happy and together, I will JOYFULLY do it knowing God is my strength and Helper. I imagine Him being tied by the neck with me as we journey through life TOGETHER.

I loved a God wink from Him yesterday. Last week I had a beautiful appointment with Him reading Psalm 138. I loved it so much that I got a paper and pencil to write out the words:

“Though I walk in the midst of trouble, thou will revive me: thou shalt stretch forth thy hand against the wrath of mine enemies, and thou right hand shall save me. The LORD WILL PERFECT THAT WHICH CONCERNETH ME…”

Fast forward to yesterday, a message came in from a friend:

Psalm 138:8: “THE LORD WILL PERFECT ALL THAT CONCERNETH YOU.”

Another love note from God! He was also reminding me that He is familiar with all my ways: ‘Nik, I saw you writing out these verses the other day! And they’re correct, I will protect you from your enemies and perfect ALL that concerns you.’ Amen!

See how sweet God is?!? Stand down on hiring any house staff is the feeling I’m getting. Yes, Boss! And like my brother said, God will level out this situation. He has His ways of working behind the scenes of our lives:

“The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”

Back to my cleaning and washing…

#GODisreallyREAL

That was from one of my daughters this morning when we discussed a character from a movie we watched yesterday. So, I gave them one of my talks about how I want them living life from a perspective of:

“God, what would YOU have me to do here?”

I know they are so tired of hearing this speech from me, but honestly, this is the best strategy for living. In the 1,000 decisions we make every day, going to God and seeking His wisdom and guidance in any and every situation reflecting the GOD IS LOVE character. He has plans to prosper us and not harm us, but if we’re not going to Him and asking for His wisdom in conducting our lives, we miss out.

“No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly. -Psalm 84:11”

Like that cook I hired. I quickly made that decision to give her a try without consulting God first, and that one week she was with us turned out to be awful. THE BIG LESSON I’m taking from this experience is to ALWAYS seek God’s input before doing anything (big and small). I should have taken some time to pray over it first before agreeing for her to come, and letting God be the one to help me through my Spirit discern whether or not this lady was good for our house or not. Meaning I should have paid attention to God’s voice within me. Peaceful, relaxed, happy feelings are usually God saying Yes, go ahead, and stressful, doubtful, fearful, anxious ones are God saying hold on, slow your roll, Nik, maybe this is not a good idea.

GET GOD INVOLVED WITH EVERY DECISION!!! That’s my advice to you. Don’t take my word for it, though, start getting to know God’s voice for yourself. He is with us and for us.

Today, I’m back to my fasting because I want an even closer walk with God – THIS LIFE IS TREACHEROUS! I wish to live continuously in God’s Presence, knowing that there is never a moment in life when I’m alone and away from Him. There is the material side of life and what we can see, but we MUST pay attention to the spiritual side as well – what we can’t see. God sees and knows it all, and He is the ultimate controller and why we can CONFIDENTLY trust Him with our battles. Doing what He would have us to do in every moment and then leaving the rest for Him to fight on our behalf in the spiritual realm. Wink! Wink!

#GODisreallyREAL

My housekeeper, Joy, that is. Unfortunately, we MUST hold everyone in our lives with OPEN HANDS because no one will be with us forever. WE CAN BE SURE OF GOD, but when it comes to other people, that’s a different matter altogether, let me tell ya.

But Joy has left me with lots of lessons. Like she was EXTREMELY HARDWORKING, and she’s a big reason why I’ve decided to leave my comfort (lazy) zone. I’m inspired! Emmie, my son, gave me a running goal of 100 minutes for today, and I did it! I’m honestly tired of living a mediocre life where I maybe give like 40% effort. I seriously MUST up my game if I’m going to give God more than He expects from me. Joy came to work every day giving her best, and, LOTS OF TIMES, I was the one telling her not to work so hard and to finish up another day, but she would always insist on going full force! I will miss you, my Joy!

She worked as if God was her Boss! And that’s where I want us, keeping our eyes fixed on God and what HE would have us to do, moment by moment. Not looking to anyone else for approval or recognition, but merely looking within ourselves and at God and HIS high values. Remember, God and Heaven are our audiences, and they’re always watching. When we give our best, trust me, God gives us HIS VERY BEST! WinK! Wink! Today, I’m taking another sucker punch, but I know my reward is with Him! He has blessed my life so much that now I run to do whatever is pleasing to Him. God, what would make You happy here?

But despite my lack of push, I’m still proud of the Nikki I’ve been, the Nikki I am now, and the Nikki I will strive to be in the future. Ain’t nobody perfect! When you know better, hopefully, you do better. So, no beating myself up over past mistakes and failures. And no judging anyone else, either. Everyone has their race to run. I so love the story of the adulterer when Jesus asked that whoever was without sin should cast the first stone. Everyone walked away without stoning her. Really, who are we to judge anyone? The only person we should be hard on is ourselves, working on constant and never-ending improvement, ALL FOR GOD’S GLORY. Gentle on others but extremely hard on ourselves!

However, I must tell you how I love my Fierce Babes Club with my two daughters and myself. We’ve committed to helping each other accomplish our goals, like a team training for the Olympics. On Sunday, we met to discuss long term and weekly targets. We’ve also agreed to keep ourselves accountable to excellent standards, even in regards to what we eat, correcting each other whenever necessary. Ember fell off the wagon yesterday in regards to something she promised herself to do, but today I told her I would sit with her so that she makes it happen like real teammates. Discipline, my boo!

“We should never forget, you and I, that everything we do badly should be done well and everything we do well can be done better; and if we’re to go in that direction, we need not only good-will, for our part, but also helpful criticism from others.” – Jesus As Friend by Salvatore Canals

GODisreallyREAL

TODAY, I RAN SIX MILES IN TWO HOURS UP AND DOWN THE STAIRS OF OUR HOUSE!!! I’m working on a better me, baby! The goal was to get rid of the old Nik and my constant sad and hurtful thoughts, and for a happier and more focused person to emerge. And so far, I think it did the trick! I’ve learned that if I don’t control my thoughts, they will take control of me. Let me tell you, the quality of our thoughts WILL determine the quality of your life!

The run was fantastic! I did another one of my Coach Andy Nike Run Club runs and heard the incredible story of his guest athlete, Lopez Lomong, from being kidnapped in Sudan as a six-year-old kid by rebel soldiers to being an Olympic athlete representing the United States years later.

But, in between listening to his story, I pretty much played one song repeatedly, ‘Let Me Be The One To Love You,’ (William Singe’s version) imagining God singing these lyrics to me:

“You should let Me love you
Let me be the One to
Give you everything you want and need
Ooh baby good love and protection
Make Me your selection
Show you the way love’s supposed to be
Baby love you”

After hearing that one song so many times I said, “God, You got it! I will let You be the One to love me!” Phew! So when the depressing thoughts and reminders come up again about some hurts and disappointments from the past, I can now say, “Go away!!! God’s girl here!” and I can instead focus on God’s love and be happy, keeping no more records of wrongs.

On Saturday, I was asking Him to help me wrap my head around a situation and He answered me. As I was in one part of our bedroom reading my meditation book, my son, Joshie, was asking my husband a question and at the very same time I read the word “SUPPORT,” my husband was responding to our son with the exact word. LIKE PERFECTLY TIMED!!! Of course, I took this as another one of my God winks when out of the blue, everything lines up STRANGELY TOO PERFECTLY, with an important message from God for all of us:

“Of Bearing the Defects of Others

But now God has disposed things that we may learn to bear one another’s burdens; for there is no one without defects, no one without burdens, no one sufficient for himself, no one wise enough for himself, but we must SUPPORT one another, comfort one another, assist, instruct and admonish one another.” – Imitation of Christ

Can we do that for Him? Honestly, that’s what I took from that conversation from Lopez today, how everywhere he went, he considered everyone family the way he was SUPPORTED through his horrific journey. My fav were the boys who helped him to escape the rebel camp who he called his angels. They knew his older brother and immediately when he was brought there, they met him and said something like, “Don’t worry, we’ll take care of you. We’re family.” And they did.

I believe we’re not the human race; we’re the human family! Let’s go the extra mile in loving, supporting, assisting, instructing, and admonishing one another. God is our BOSS, and our reward is with Him. And let Him be the one to love us! His love is more than enough! Wink! Wink!

#GODisreallyREAL