That was me to my daughter, Julie, referring to my angel/brother, Kevin. Not only has he helped to keep my head together, but he has also helped me make some pretty significant decisions!!!!!!! I explained to her that not everything about life is black and white. Things are multi-dimensional, filled with many textures, layers, and colors that are inexplicable and mysterious. In each moment, there is so much going on that impacts eternity. Crazy, right?
Like Kevin is forever telling me to be patient. That patience led to this conversation with my husband today (I paraphrase here):
“Boo, do you realize our decisions today will affect not only our children but our grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and on and on from generation to generation? I was listening to the radio today and a wife was saying the secret of her marriage that has lasted for over 29 years was communication and sacrifice. Honey, this sacrifice (splitting our family apart) you have made for our children and future generations coming after them, I thank you. Thank you from the very bottom of my heart with the deepest and sincerest love and devotion.
I saw Ember (our daughter) on a video call in the skybox of her university overlooking the football team, and I was just in awe. She looked so beautiful and happy. She is about to start her Wall Street internship, and we did that for her. Immediately Julie went to her university sendoff event, and she was also offered a Wall Street internship. I know this whole thing has been difficult, but it’s been a worthy sacrifice for our kids, and I’ll forever thank you for this. I bow to you. No matter what we must go through, this wife is sticking with you.”
On our way to school this morning, the boys and I called hubby, and he told them that he and Julie had planned a date to cook another African dish for them. I asked our sons, “Did I find you guys the best dad or what? Even from Nigeria he wants to make sure you guys are eating well.”
This marriage thing is not easy, though, and the crazy lady in me would have me think the wrong things, all mad and bitter, but God and Kevin have been teaching me to focus on the good in others and to go the extra mile and love and forgiveness. With the love, generosity, and support I receive from Kevin, I say I want to be that for others. Learning to be much kinder, gentler, and compassionate, learning to overlook and ignore, and loving unconditionally the way God loves us all. Nobody’s perfect!
Let’s keep giving our best, especially in our homes, so that future generations will be thanking us too for the decisions we make today. They watch us fight for our families so that they will do the same when their turn comes. Thanks, Kevin (and God for arranging you to come to my rescue!) for being my guard rails and helping me to get here! I pray God continues to bless you plenty, plenty for the love you show us!!! Enjoy the Audi! I’m enjoying doing the family hustle with you! Wink! Wink!