“I’M FEELING FREAKY DEAKY”

That was me singing and dancing out on my run today (in the pic!) with Tyga and Doja Cat. Honestly, it was a struggle to complete my 3.11 miles. Still, it was the perfect struggle as I got to spend extra time with God, asking Him to help me wrap my head around the stuff going on in my life. And He did! Here’s what I felt Him saying to me through various songs and my reading and listening to old posts and videos:

Nik, be on chill mode; not taking anything too seriously, girl. ‘I’m trying to hear all your problems so I can lighten the load. No, you not fighting alone ‘cause I’m protectin’ you from them (So chill).’ – On Chill, Wale

Nik, time to get back into Tom Brady (greatest athlete) mode! Doing everything for My glory! I want you to shine even brighter than ever, aiming to be the most extraordinary person, wife, and mom on My behalf. Reflect Me! What you eat, drink, do; everything for Me. — Told y’all! I’m God’s official influencer, baby!

Nik, Look around you. Look at your life. Enjoy it, My girl! The spec of a cross I’ve asked you to carry for Me, I want you to accept it joyfully, lovingly, hide it behind a beautiful smile! Be my representative in the world. Inspire! — Yes, Boss! Watch me, Superman!

Nik, you must make allowances for the weaknesses of others. Keep forgiving. Keep loving extravagantly. Be the glue keeping your family and home together peacefully, happily, and lovingly. Pretend you don’t see what you see or hear what you hear. Leave the past in the past. Tie love and loyalty around your neck! Keep silent and vent all your frustrations to me. I got you, boo!

Nik, stop being a baby-face whiner! Suck it up, buttercup! My grace is sufficient to help you tackle any problem or situation. Keep your eyes on me, and I’ll direct you on the best paths for your life, moment by moment, step by step. Take life one day at a time.

Nik, “I can’t get enough of your love. How can I explain all the things I feel? You’ve given me so much. Girl, you’re so unreal, still. I keep loving you. More and more each time. Girl, what am gonna do? Because you’re blowin’ My mind. Can’t get enough of your love (And I sing these lyrics right back to Him!).” – Can’t Get Enough of Your Love, Barry White

Make sure you’re having your alone times with God! This life is too hard! We need His wisdom and guidance! I don’t want to be alone singing and happy dancing in the streets! MAKE GOD YOUR LIFE PARTNER, knowing He is with you 24/7, loving, supporting, protecting, guiding, and helping you! His invisible Presence is ALWAYS with us. Any problem in any aspect of your life, He can help you with that! Wink! Wink! But you must spend time getting to know Him and learn His voice! These runs are my time to hash out anything bothering me with Him. Throughout the day, I also read or listen to the spiritual stuff that keeps me focused on God and not this crazy world.

TURNING ROLLING WITH GOD INTO A LIFESTYLE, BABY!

I want everyone here with me where we are living, moving, and having our entire being in God all day, every day. From one moment to the next, asking God what He would have us do (or not do!), what He would have us say (or not say!), where He would have us go (or not go!), and even what He would have us think (or not think!). Yes, wrapped up with God in every moment!

I called my brother, Kevin, thanking him again for allowing me to lean on him for the past few years – everyone needs someone to lean on! I promise you, he gives me direct messages from God. Like the day he told me not to stop running. There I was running every day like a crazy person (my mom still laughs at me about that!), but that time to spend with God and hash everything I was going through with Him, was PRICELESS! LIFE IS A WAR, and God is an expert in everything! The time running built me up spiritually, emotionally, and physically, and I’m learning to discern quite clearly God’s directions. I may not always get it right, but I keep at it! No drugs or alcohol are needed to cope (which leads us down dark paths); I throw on my exercise clothes and sneakers as soon as I get up, and this spiritual practice of running with God has been carrying your girl through her rough patch. No shame; I NEED GOD!

In the middle of the runs, I take time to see what God has to say to me, LEARNING AND STUDYING HIS GUIDING PRINCIPLES FOR MY LIFE. I read our family’s website, and today I had a great time listening to Ceri’s messages. I especially felt God was talking to me through him saying I needed to hand over some silly battles to God and stop stressing about them. That I should do like God is a manager who I refer difficult problems to, trusting God to handle tough battles while I go on with my life. This particular one, I felt God saying I even never have to speak of it again, simply leave it in God’s capable hands. Allowing God to be God by showing up strong on my behalf! GOD, ALL MY TRUST IS IN YOU!

Are you making rolling with God your lifestyle? God helps us to take on our lives skillfully and calmly. People will hurt, disappoint, and frustrate us, but God always exceeds our expectations when we stick with Him. Every concern of ours is a concern of His! He is just waiting like a shy person for you to invite Him in and be a part of every move and decision you make. Don’t miss out on the best life, KNOWING THE CREATOR OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE IS WITH AND FOR YOU! Tell Him you want to roll with Him 24/7!

I’M A BIG DEAL NOW!!!

Heehaw!!! You know how I always call myself God’s Rockstar and how I’m His influencer in the world? Well, God went through the trouble to make it official, baby! My girl, Anita Sirene (formally known as Star Girl), did a YouTube video with her predictions for March. I promise you, out of the three groups to pick from, I felt God screaming in my spirit, ‘PICK NUMBER THREE!!!’ Amazingly, in that same group, Anita said this:

“Heard some of you are going to be joining a church or some of you are going to be active in a church or active in a Spiritual Community. A lot of you are destined to be spiritual leaders, is what I’m hearing or just you’re meant to be leaders in general. YOU’RE MEANT TO BE AN INFLUENCER OF GOD (WINK! WINK!), Group Three, which means the way that you lived, who it is that you are, the way that you move, is supposed to be a representation of God or of your belief system.

_So, you’re really being put in the spotlight in March, where your energy is highly influential because God’s putting you in the spotlight in March to influence people with your energy and your behavior. This is your Phoenix Rising month, guys, so you know if you have been going through a lot of bad luck, if life has been really bad, in March this is when you’re really gonna start feeling better again. You’re gonna start feeling like your old self. _

And I’m hearing like a spiritual belief system is really carrying you through. Like it’s really helped you transform whatever that is, so the point I’m trying to make is that February sucked. I’m willing to bet your life has pretty much sucked since December, but March is going to start getting a lot better.”

God truly makes me feel like His fav girl with the attention and love He shows me by even going to the extent of having Anita deliver that message to me. Yay, I’m not crazy – I AM A GOD INFLUENCER!!! This message was completely spot on! December, especially, was a rough month, but as Anita stated, my spiritual belief system continues to carry me through a rough life patch. Knowing God is with me, even in my lowest moments, gives me the courage, joy, and strength to keep going.

No alcohol or drugs were needed to numb the pain; I went to God. Reading our family’s website was my go-to spot to hear from Him, and let me tell ya, when you sincerely seek God, you will find Him. He would always figure out some way to let me see even a tiny glimmer of His Presence with me. And I made it through, moment by moment, step by step, and day by day, holding on to God’s hand. I TRUST IN GOD’S FAITHFULNESS!

I honestly feel like my old self again, but with an entirely new perspective on life. Today, in talking to a customer/friend (who I’m a little bit upset with because he divorced his wife), he said he followed his happiness to make decisions. I explained to him that I make decisions by asking God what would make Him happy, and in doing that (following God’s leading and guiding principles like loving unconditionally, faithfulness, and loyalty), He has led my life on a beautiful path. Everything is between God and us, not between us and anyone else! Obedience to Him is the way to the best life!

This morning, under my God tree, hubby and I continued our prayer streak (even if I’m boiling angry, I still call for us to pray together!), and we thanked God for exceeding our expectations. Not everything is perfect, but in looking at the big picture, WE ARE INCREDIBLY GRATEFUL FOR EVERYTHING GOD HAS DONE AND CONTINUES TO DO FOR US (things could be lots worse!). I also once again recommitted my life to God, asking Him to help me be an even better wife, mom, and person (His influencer!) on His behalf in the world.

Make sure you pray and seek God’s guidance for your life-PRAYERS DO CHANGE THINGS (Wink! Wink!). Our God is with us and wants a relationship with you, too!!! Pray for a closer walk with Him while learning to pause and include Him in every decision you make by listening to Him in your spirit (like how He told me to pick number three for that special message from Him). His sheep know His voice!

“NO ONE IS GOING TO COME AND DESTROY OUR FAMILY, PERIOD!!!”

That was a conversation I had with my daughter, Ember, recently! As I fight for our family, I teach her and our other kids to do the same thing when it’s their turn. OUR FAMILIES STICKING TOGETHER IS IMPORTANT TO GOD! But even more important is our personal relationships with Him to know where He is directing us on a moment-by-moment basis. I laughed with God at how I felt Him telling me to go to Nigeria one minute, and the next, He was saying to stand down. God, which is it? You’re confusing me here! (LOL!)

I can’t get over how God talks to me through our family friend, Ceri. He did one of his recordings one day mentioning training like Rocky and something like trusting the process. Your girl here took that as her cue to get into Rocky mode for 50 days, training myself like I was preparing for a big fight (and the fight is on!). I said I would run a 5K (3.11 miles), and every day your girl has been getting stronger and stronger to take on my life, man. This life is truly no joke! I go to my God tree to pray with my husband. I also use it as an opportunity to RECOMMIT myself to God, asking for His help in becoming the Nik He would have me to be – wiser, stronger, to have more faith and less fear, courageous, more loving and forgiving, gentler, peaceful, faithful, loyal, focused, disciplined in my thoughts and actions, so help us all, God, please!

I’ve added in the Nike Running Club app, and today it was listening to Olympian English Gardener, Coach Bennet, and Andy Puddicombe. I thoroughly enjoyed every single moment, taking lots of notes (I paraphrase here!):

“Only the impossible is worth doing” (like me wanting to bring a billion people closer to God!)

“Fight fear with faith” (constantly replacing negative thoughts with ones of knowing God is with us at every moment – our help comes from the Lord! TRUSTING GOD WITH ALL OUR HEARTS!!!)

“Mistakes are ok!” (let’s keep using them to learn from and be better! Also, being gentler with ourselves and others)

“To stay hopeful despite how things may seem” (our Hope is in God, and there is no situation too difficult for Him! The battles don’t belong to us; they belong to God! Wink! Wink!

“I spoke to myself better” (something we can all work on! Nik, I’m so proud of you! You may fall a million times, but you keep getting back up!)

“Make every moment count” (keep giving your best with your constant focus on God and what He would have you do!

“I made myself get back up after every fall” (I push myself out to do that 5K every day whether I feel like it or not!)

“You come back stronger after you fall -wiser, more confident, and humbler” (me too!!!)

“If I can survive being homeless twice, I can survive anything!” (as long as we have breath and God, we’re good! Let’s keep going!)

“You have your bouts, but you keep swinging. Life will throw you some hard balls!” (God’s grace is enough to tackle any situation!)

“Appreciate life!” (HEEHAW!!! Knowing we have God with us!)

“SORRY YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS HARD STUFF”

That was from my sweetie pie daughter, Julie, today. She was referring to some messy and complicated stuff I’m facing that had me book an immediate flight to Nigeria. This life is not easy! But what’s truly astonishing about the whole situation is how God found all these ways to show me that I don’t handle life alone; He is with me. HEEHAW!!!

Yesterday, in all my anger, I stopped in the middle of my run to rush to my lap top to see if I could leave to Nigeria the same day. As I’m on the website, a friend calls me, out of the blue, and shockingly asks, “Are you in Nigeria yet?” I replied, “Boo, why are you asking me that?” And she said, “I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while, but keep forgetting.” I then told her how I was right in front of my laptop at that very moment, on the actual airline’s website, about to book the ticket. We both were in shock as to how God would have her to call at that precise time, as if confirming that HE HIMSELF was saying I needed to go and make that flight. Let me tell ya, God is pretty talkative! Like no way, that was a coincidence that she called from the other side of the world asking me that question as I sat there so angrily searching for a flight.

Then, I’ve been in this Rocky mode for the past two weeks or so where I run 3.11 miles everyday. So, with all my emotions flying so high, I decided to call the airline directly to ask them to help me book it. To speak to an agent, guess what numbers I needed to press on the phone: 311. Then, my phone sends me an email to remind me of the flight at exactly 3:11 am! Again, no coincidence, God HIMSELF again saying Nik, take that flight!!!

Then, I was talking to my sister, Verona, about the situation and told her how this lady told me that the conversation I needed to have with my husband was one where I needed to go and have FACE TO FACE. Going to eat my dinner and continue watching this TV show, ‘Married At First Sight,’ a couple of hours later, the very episode I continued from was entitled “FACE TO FACE.” Again, GOD HIMSELF saying, Nik, get your butt to Nigeria and talk to hubs FACE TO FACE.

Fast forward to today, and after having a major fight with hubby about the entire thing, can you believe the message I felt from God was to stand down and NOT go. Yup, the crazy lady was told by God to go away! I felt Him in my spirit telling me to be kind and gentle with hubs instead.

I have to thank my God influencer, Ceri, who has taught me about loving others unconditionally and how God gives us the ability to forgive. And my brother, Kevin, who said we should not be God, but His angels. On that show, a pastor of one of the cast members said something significant: “You made a vow before God for better or for worse.” So when I look at the situation from a God perspective, I’m reminded of how much I mess up, and God loves and forgives me, and how He commands us to do the same for others.

I was happy for the little hash out with hubs (crazy lady needed to make that appearance!). Still, listening to God (where I want us all continually), I went back on the high road of loving extravagantly and forgiving endlessly. NO ONE IS PERFECT! This afternoon I was back telling the kids in our family group that we should all overwhelm their dad with our deep love, respect, and appreciation for all he has done and continues to do. I remain loyal, boo.

SOMETIMES YOU WILL HAVE TO WALK THROUGH SOME DUCK POOP!

That’s God having fun with me when I went for my noontime appointment with Him. What I love most about former President Trump is that he taught me, “It is what it is!” There will be some messy, challenging, complex, tricky, frustrating, overwhelming stuff we will face – it is what it is – but all my vlogs and blogs aim to teach you how to deal with them from the Almighty God’s perspective. Wink! Wink! We’re not alone, my peeps, WE GOT GOD AND HE GOT US!!!

Like yesterday, when a difficult situation came up, your girl had to come out swinging like Tiger Woods’s wife – NO, I’M NOT TAKING THIS BS ANY LONGER, PERIOD! THERE IS A CERTAIN THING CALLED RESPECT!!! Don’t let the cute face and pleasant smile fool ya! That was all based on my conversation with God that’s going on all day in my head. The next day the message was completely different, and the softer Nik needed to return. So all day, 24/7, I want us there with God, seeking His input on every situation.

I loved this comment today from a long-time Facebook friend:

“You have such a beautiful Soul. You’re beautiful on the inside and out. You are also hurting. I’ve heard you say many times people tell you you’re always talking about God and how u need to have faith. You are the type of woman that wants and need that physical, spiritual, n mental support from your twin flame 24/7 – 365. You come across as not having faith because you’re hurting. You need, want n deserve hubby to be right there by your side.”

I replied, “No, I needed to know that God is always beside me. That’s the big lesson in all the hurts.” And my message to us all – people will hurt us, disappoint us, and forsake us, but every time I get hurt, I run to God, and HE IS ALWAYS THERE TO WRAP HIS ARMS AROUND ME AND LET ME KNOW THAT EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT. That’s the sweetness of God I want the entire world to feel with me. God tells me that sometimes He doesn’t mind me having the worst days, and I don’t mind either. Those difficult days took me closer to Him. (HUGE SMILE)

And from God’s perspective, I look at situations lots clearer. Nik, did they remove one strand of hair from your head? Nik, look where you are – you have a gorgeous life; enjoy it! So, if that means taking my 10,000 punches (the hurts) for God, I say no problem because God honestly EXCEEDS my expectations with the love and attention He shows me.

I’m well taken care of by God and hubby! Those hurts from hubby, I take them too because of the person he is. I honestly call him better than best hubby! Nobody’s perfect! So if he messes up, I forgive him. I love him unconditionally because of his track record of going overboard in his responsibilities as a husband and dad – I remain loyal, boo! But sometimes I must check him, though, and say, “Buddy, this is going a little bit too far! Check yourself before you wreck yourself!

BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, I WILL NEVER GIVE UP ON HIM AND OUR MARRIAGE, so help me, God. I’m the super glue that keeps the family together (my role from God!) Badass wifey here! Our sticking together and fighting for our families is crucial to Him. But every situation is different, and that’s where constant and continual conversations with God come in! Make sure you are having your appointments with Him, reading or listening to anything spiritual, to learn His voice and direction for your life.

“EVEN AT MY LOWEST, I’M PRAISING GOD” (REPOST)

That was me yesterday in one of my YouTube videos, and where I want us all, praising and thanking God no matter what is going on in our lives. Yesterday, I was home alone feeling all sorry for myself, and I didn’t want to call my kids to let them know I was missing them. I was having one of my pity parties feeling down physically, mentally, and emotionally. I thought to instead have an appointment with God reading from my book that I’m currently NOT working on. This showed up:

“I cried yesterday listening to a freshman in high school, Madison, pray this prayer at Bel Air’s church in California:

“Dear Lord, thank You for this day. Thank You for waking us up this morning. And thank You for everything You give us. I pray for us to help know Your BOLDNESS. That we will be able to move forward in our faith, in our prayer life, and in everything that we are doing. That you will be at the center of every move we make and KNOW THAT MISTAKES ARE OK. To know that we can move forward and that YOU ARE BY OUR SIDE THROUGH ALL OF IT. And that we will be able to prosper and have abundance and growth and help other people to grow as well through knowing you and knowing your faith and boldness… Amen.”

I smiled with God, feeling reminded that He was by my side through everything I go through, even the low moments. I see His loving hands in every aspect of my life. Yes, sometimes He asks some difficult stuff of me, but when I put them against all He is doing, I just have to say, ‘God, anything for You.’ In fact, I’ve made this my personal challenge from Him and phone’s screensaver:

“I’m challenging you to resist ALL evil with an even STRONGER commitment to love, goodness, and faithfulness.”

Can we all do that for God? Going the extra mile, all for His glory. Someone had really inspired me this week when He said that He sees God reflected in me by how I live my life. I mess up constantly, so that was a nice compliment. He also encouraged me to do a better job in my work for God because He sees how God shows up for us. The more beautiful we are, the more beautiful God looks! Let’s all be His angels in the world. He is increasing my capacity to forgive, overlook, and to be gentler in my interactions with others. Life is hard enough. We don’t need to make it harder for others or ourselves. Wink! Wink!

GOD IS THE SUGAR IN MY LIFE, BABY!!!

I’m enjoying my 5K runs (3.11 miles) with God every day! I crazily started a support group for myself some months ago feeling so broken down, sad, anxious, overwhelmed, hurt, and frustrated, but now I’m bragging to them how I’m feeling stronger than ever, with such love and confidence in God, AND I WANT THE ENTIRE WORLD HERE WITH ME. Today, I just want to share the song Sugar by Maroon 5 that I’ve been singing all day to God:

I’m hurting, baby, I’m broken down (me starting that support group!)
I need Your loving, loving, I need it now
When I’m without You
I’m something weak (crazy, depressed, hurt, sad, anxious and overwhelmed!)
You got me begging
Begging, I’m on my knees

I don’t wanna be needing Your love
I just wanna be deep in Your love (where I want us all!!!)
And it’s killing me when You’re away
Ooh, baby,
‘Cause I really don’t care where You are
I just wanna be there where You are (every moment heart to heart with God)
And I gotta get one little taste

Your sugar
Yes, please
Won’t You come and put it down on me
I’m right here, ’cause I need
Little love and little sympathy
Yeah you show me good loving (He exceeds my expectations!)
Make it alright
Need a little sweetness in my life
Your sugar
Yes, please
Won’t You come and put it down on me (He has!)

My broken pieces
You pick them up (God makes me better!)
Don’t leave me hanging, hanging
Come give me some
When I’m without Ya
I’m so insecure (God wants us all to know we are secure in Him!)
You are the One Thing
The One Thing, I’m living for (doing it all for His glory!)

I don’t wanna be needing Your love
I just wanna be deep in Your love
And it’s killing me when you’re away
Ooh, baby,
‘Cause I really don’t care where you are
I just wanna be there where you are
And I gotta get one little taste

Your sugar
Yes, please

I want us to know without any doubt that we have God’s continuous Presence with us at every moment and tapping into His constant love, approval, favor, wisdom, strength, boldness, courage, generosity, guidance, and plans. His sugar! (HUGE SMILE) Don’t miss out! Tell God that you want to walk closer with Him!!!!