“GRATEFUL I HAD ALL THE PATIENCE”

That was me singing and dancing in my car to Meek Mill’s song Dangerous yesterday. In fact, I should change my name to Patience because patience is seriously working for your girl over here. This pic is my girls dressed for their College Day at school. Ember is aiming for New York University and Julie, Columbia University, also in New York. The other day we had a little falling out, and I couldn’t even pretend to be mad at them. I immediately forgave because they’re such great daughters that I MUST be patient with them.

As soon as I woke up this morning, I called hubby and the boys in Nigeria. The boys have some progress tests next week, and I wanted to make sure they were up studying. We had an appointment with God as they sat having their Sunday brunch, all prepared by my incredible husband (another example of how PATIENCE is working for me – the best husband has shown up!). Emmie picked number 200 from our Purpose Driven Life Devotional for Kids, and I read this verse to them:

“Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. NOTHING WILL BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU.” – Matthew 17:20

Wow, what a way to start off a Sunday morning! I had a meeting that lasted a couple of hours yesterday with a possible management candidate, and he said he was sad for me. I replied, “There is nothing to be sad about. God has been good to us. Things may not have worked out the way we’ve expected, but we’ve handed the disappointments to God, grateful for where we are, and we have FAITH that God will help us turn things around.”

“If you didn’t count on Me (God) for help, to whom would you turn? Hope and trust to the utmost in Me, and you will honor Me. And I’ll answer you every time you call.”

“Even when you feel good for nothing, give Me this nothing. Didn’t I create with nothing.” – He and I

Guys, I don’t know about you, but in every aspect of my life, I’m counting on God’s help. This business that’s off track, I’m going to God for His guidance in every moment asking what He would have us to do, little by little, to turn things around. The girls will be driving themselves to and from school, and again, I’m counting on God’s Presence to be with them. My husband and boys all the way in Nigeria; again, I’m relying on God’s protection and wisdom to help us all make the right decisions. Let’s all put our utmost trust and honor in Him.

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GOD, I’VE CHANGED MY MIND!

LOL! That was me to Him yesterday after writing this in my last post:

“GOD, WHATEVER YOU WANT ME TO DO!
He seems to be asking something difficult, and I’ve answered, ‘God, anything for You. I have options, but You’re my top one!’

A day later… ‘sorry God, ain’t happening! This is just too much!!!’ But, as I was walking past the inspiration book section of a store last night, I randomly opened to a page of one, and it was a direct message from Him: WE’RE TO HELP ONE ANOTHER. Kk, God, anything for You.

And why such faithfulness and loyalty to God? Because He has been the GREATEST FRIEND EVER. He’s always there for me. In every aspect of my life, in any problem, any distress, He has never failed. On top of that, the unconditional love and acceptance I feel from Him are incredible.

Yesterday, my nephew, Duro, says to me, “Aunty, you don’t have much you’re working with.” I read an old post to him where I quoted from my meditation book what I felt God saying to me after feeling like a total loser one night:

“Even when you feel good for nothing, give Me this nothing. Didn’t I create with nothing.”

Duro, God created the entire universe from nothing! I’m sticking with Him to turn my nothing into something! All things are possible with God!

From then on, the whole entire day, I kept quoting this back to him as to how God can meet us at our lowest of the low if we give that to Him and ask His help in getting us back on the right track again. He’s pretty fantastic like that!

And right before going to bed, look what showed up in my appointment with God:

“Even when you feel good for nothing, give Me this nothing. Didn’t I create with nothing.”

This was just His sweet way of letting me know He is with me. I wanted to read the new meditation book, but I got the feeling from Him to read this one. He also used that time to say this to me (and now you!):

“Why do you sometimes think of Me as a severe master waiting for a chance to find fault with you? Wouldn’t you rather see Me a very loving friend, ready to make excuses for you if you fall? The friend who keeps watch over you. Don’t you think I’m like that?”

I guess we get so used to other humans always waiting for us to mess up, fall, and criticize us, that we see God in this same light, but He really is always ready to make excuses for us. He said to me yesterday on my run with Him: “Don’t belittle your best when this is the best you can do.” I started crying because I’ve been so hard on myself, lately. He knows my heart, and He knows every burden I’m carrying. This transition from Nigeria hasn’t been easy for your girl, but God has been faithful – Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning! Let’s keep our eyes fixed on God and not this crazy, fallen world!

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GOD, WHATEVER YOU WANT ME TO DO!

He seems to be asking something difficult, and I’ve answered, ‘God, anything for You. I have options, but You’re my top one!’ In every situation, in every aspect of my life, when I follow His leading (seriously sometimes going against what I want to do), everything somehow works out way better than I expect.

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…” – Ephesians 3:20

I have a confession. I’ve made some big mistakes recently because I’ve been trying to run our business here in Florida without going to my husband for his advice and guidance, and it has NOT turned out well. I had to call him yesterday in Nigeria and say, ‘Hon, I need you. I’ve messed up because I didn’t want to seem like baby wife calling you for advice, but that has not worked out. Anything I’m doing, I will get you involved.”

And it’s the same way with God. We can do life without Him, but I don’t recommend it. Even talking to someone today who is being divorced by his wife and unable to see his daughter, I had to give him a little pep talk. I said look where you’ve gotten trying to make decisions on your own – things are not going well. Slow down and learn to go to God, and He can help you get everything on track again little by little. I showed him my new screensaver (a message from God):

“May your life be Mine—uninterruptedly Mine” – He and I

Amen! So that means slowing down and listening to Him in every moment in every decision asking what He would have me to do and taking time to read my meditation books to learn His voice and His wisdom. When He says get hubby involved, NOW I listen. I accept the fact that when it comes to business, hubby has much more wisdom and experience than I do. And when it comes to living our best lives, God is the best Advisor there is. He is an expert in EVERYTHING!

Are you seeking input from God? Yesterday was such a great day with Ember officially getting her drivers’ license. Even with that, I see God’s hands. It’s been extremely stressful having to leave my office to rush and pick them up like 40 minutes away at school, but from last summer Ember asked, ‘Can I get my learners’ license.’ After a conversation with God, I said, “Sure, go ahead.” If not for that, I would be stuck driving them for an entire year!

It was the advice of a parenting book from nine years ago that also taught me, ‘Teach your children to be independent of you as soon as possible.’ That advice is paying off big time. I am so proud of these independent daughters I have. I see God’s hands in connecting me with the lady who loaned me that crucial book. That advice resonated with me in my spirit (God’s voice!), and before doing anything for my kids, I always think, ‘Can they do this for themselves?’ That direction from God in regards to parenting has seriously paid off! The girls are now both bragging about their all A’s so far! Keep it up, my fierce daughters and sons! ALL THE GLORY GOES TO OUR LOVING GOD!

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GOD’S GOT OUR BACK

That’s how He makes me feel with His constant love and attention, SPECIFICALLY towards me.

Point in case:

“Nikki, what’s going on?” was my hubby calling me from Nigeria yesterday. I had just gotten off a very upsetting call and I was very surprised to see him calling me minutes later. So, I’m out on this limb with God, taking control of the running of our business here in Florida, and I went against what hubby had advised me to do some weeks ago, and it wasn’t going well. I said, “Honey, I didn’t want to tell you because you’re going to say I told you so.” He replied, “Come on, you know we’re not like that. What’s going on?”

I honestly type this balling crying because this is not the first time I’ve been in a difficult situation all the way in Florida (not wanting to involve my husband), and God would have him to just call me out of the blue all the way in the US from Nigeria asking, “What’s going on?” as if he senses some trouble with me. And because my husband is always SO BUSY, I don’t want to seem like a baby wife calling him every minute. I try to take care of things on my own. But he just called me right after that call and gave me specific instructions on what to do. It wasn’t what I wanted to do, but I said, “Ok, honey, I will.”

So, doing what hubby advised, today, I asked our office assistant to help me cash a check for $700. She wrote out the check, and I asked her to please hurry because I didn’t want the issue hanging. Before she had a chance to go to the bank to cash it, already written out for $700, though, a customer comes in minutes later, goes into my office with me, and pulls out exactly $700 cash saying that this is a part payment of what she owes me. You can call this a coincident but to me, this was God’s way of saying, ‘Nik, I have your back! And I don’t want anything troubling you.’

I told you guys, I’m feeling God’s invisible Presence more than ever here in Florida. On that troublesome day, my affirmation was, ‘God, I trust You.’ I kept repeating it to myself (pray continuously because this world is rough!) I knew trouble was coming. But God had my husband to call at the perfect time to help me resolve it, and that customer randomly showing up on her own with that exact money was Him saying, ‘Nik, don’t worry about anything, I have your back.’ AND HE HAS YOURS AS WELL! Wherever we go, God’s Presence goes with us. He’s with us and for us. Relax. He will never leave us or forsake us.

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That was me to my daughter, Julie, before sleeping last night. Everything I said I was going to do, I haven’t done. I just laze out watching TV! I’m so pitiful! Five minutes after feeling like a total bum, God spoke to me through my meditation book:

“Even when you feel good for nothing, give Me this nothing. Didn’t I create with nothing?” – He and I

Awww! Is God sweet or what? I’m talking the perfect message for me to read after beating myself up to my daughter:

“Even when you feel good for nothing, give Me this nothing. Didn’t I create with nothing?”

And that’s the love I’ve gotten to know from Him, even at my lowest moments, He shows up with such attention to let me know He’s with me. The book continued:

“All I ask of you is the will to give yourself to Me at all times, in cloud or sunshine. And I’ll take you into the happy Upper Room of My servants and My friends.”

God, I will do my best! This morning that meant going to church with a neighbour. ‘Mom, why are we going?’ one of the girls asked. I said I feel God asking me to go. And I was thrilled that we did. The Pastor spoke directly to me about my laziness, procrastinating, and wasting of time (the queen of Netflix over here!). I even went to the altar to rededicate my life to Him and to continue striving to be the person He has called me to be and not so distracted.

But despite not taking my work for God seriously as I had hoped to on this break from boys and my husband, the most important thing has happened, though: I’ve gotten closer to Him! I’m finding Him show up in the tiniest of details. I’m feeling Him stronger in my spirit. Like trying to explain to the girls why we were going to church today, I just felt Him asking me to go. Like do this for Me, please, Nik. And after He has exceeded my expectations in every aspect of my life, I was happy to oblige. God, anything for You.

A life lived close to God is really the best. His ways are so much better than our ordinary human ways. Are you ready to dedicate your life to Him? For me that means focusing back on Him with my alone times for at least 30 minutes a day reading my meditation books asking, ‘God, what do You have to say to me right now?’ Then, living a life pleasing to Him in every moment. My life is becoming a Joyous Journey with God!

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“YOU CLAIM TO BE A PERSON OF GOD, BUT YOU DON’T ACT LIKE IT.”

That was the harsh criticism I got yesterday! But luckily, I had just read this in an appointment with God:

“Who is anything beside the infinitely great God? And you… you are nothing but wretchedness.”

That’s me, all day long – nothing but misery (filled with mental sufferings like regrets, hurts, pain, anguish, failure, torment, disappointments, and agony). So much so, that I laugh at myself the way I go all over the place with my emotions all day! ‘Nikki, what is wrong with you!’ I continually ask myself! I constantly fall short of the person I strive and want to be. But here is what the person writing this book felt God had to say to her:

“I feed this wretchedness every morning with My Eucharist because I want to keep you in my friendship, for I am drawn to the weakest and the poorest. Give Me everything that you blame yourself, since I am the one who transforms even the ugliest, the lowest, the most vile. I transmute everything into the gold of My glory. How can this be done? By love.”

And that love from God has changed everything for me. People may judge me, cut me off, and say whatever they want about me, but I keep my eyes solidly fixed on God. His grace is sufficient. He has truly been my greatest friend who loves me unconditionally, despite what anyone thinks or feels.

This is the GREAT LOVE I hope to share with you. Like I’d been procrastinating about going somewhere for about a week now. I finally called and asked if I could go to a closer location, five minutes from my house, and they agreed. After writing in my post yesterday that life is a joyous journey and adventure with God, I go to this office and meet a sign there saying: “Life isn’t a race…find JOY in the JOURNEY.” I KNEW THIS WAS God speaking to me, and I was exactly where He wanted me to be in that moment. I’ve had to slow my roll down this week, feeling so tired, after I’ve been running around like a crazy lady. God, I got the message – life is not a race, Nik!

Once you get to know God, you’ll start to find glimpses of His Presence everywhere you go. ‘God, what have I done to deserve Your kindness?’ Some may call that sign a coincident, but because I know God, I know me going to that office and not the other one, hours after writing that post, was all orchestrated by Him to speak to me. That’s the love I’ve gotten to know from Him and what I want you to experience. We’re all nothing but wretchedness, but wretchedness entirely and unconditionally loved by God. Others may reject us, but God loves us regardless! And His love is enough! He is our greatest friend – FOR REAL FOR REAL! I’m sticking close to Him!

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He makes me feel like the most loved person in the world with all the attention I receive from Him. Yesterday I felt extremely weak and fatigued and I pretty much dragged through the entire day like that. Even the large café con leche (coffee with milk) with extra coffee didn’t do anything for me. I was super tired!

Fast forward to that afternoon, I decided to have an appointment with God, to lean on His heart for a little bit. I continued from where I had last left off to read this message from Him:

“I am with you; that is all you need. My power shows up best in weak people.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9

“…when I am weak, then I am strong –the less I have, the more I depend on him. Whenever you feel weak God is reminding you to depend on Him.” – The Purpose Driven Life

That was the perfect message for me in that moment! No shame in my game! I can therefore boast of my weaknesses because those weak times that I go to Him, remind me that He is with me and He’s intimately involved in every moment of my life. We’re not going through life alone, God is with us!

In fact, whenever I sense any type of disturbance within me, I use it as an opportunity to RUN to God and say, ‘Help me, I don’t like feeling this way.’ I then reflect on the situation from His Almighty perspective and what He would have me to do. And His view changes everything. I constantly remind myself that my life is a joyous journey and adventure with Him. Every day is unique and filled with so much that I have to be grateful for. I keep my eyes fixed on God and not this world! I immediately shake off the disappointments or whatever is disturbing me, and go back to being the loving, forgiving, trusting in God, and going the extra mile person He has called me to be. Everything is between God and me, not between me and anyone else! God, my reward is with You!

Are you having those crucial appointments with God to learn His voice and what He has to say specifically to you? We need Him! His unconditional love is there for us. I feel that weakness yesterday was to slow me down and have some quiet time with Him to reflect on what is His purpose is for my life. Am I living the life He has called me to live? Are you? He doesn’t push Himself on us, but a life lived close to Him is the best!

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PERSPECTIVE IS EVERYTHING!

And I’m importantly living from the perspective of KNOWING God is with me. I can relax and trust He’s working behind the scenes of my life on everything that is concerning me. This God factor changes everything. I no longer have to figure out how to resolve situations on my own, I can trust that God will show me one step, then the next, then the next, to help me get through anything that may come my way. There is nothing too difficult for God. I lay ALL my affairs in His hands!

Are you here with me, trusting that God is intimately involved in your life? He reminded me of that yesterday when I needed to get some sim cards for the girls’ phones. They still had their Nigerian numbers, and after their school kept calling my office yesterday about a situation, I was determined to get them US numbers so they can always reach me in case of an emergency. We got to the store, and there is a 50-minute wait time to see a sales representative, but I said no problem, we’ll wait!

A lady comes in while we were waiting and she didn’t see a seat so she stood at the back. I pointed out a seat up front, but she kindly gave it to another customer waiting. She eventually found another place. Some minutes later, I had to leave the chair where I sat, and I ended up sitting next to this very lady. We started talking, and she strangely asked when was my birthday. Can you believe we both share the exact birthday? She even got out her drivers’ license to show me! I asked her what prompted her to ask me that and she said she just liked my spirit. I then told her all about my blogging and how I’m this crazy God lady, and I asked if I could include her. She unbelievably said something like, ‘Yes, I’ve been wanting to get closer to God. I feel so blessed by Him.’

I then go to my Nook where I read my meditation books on my phone. The very words on that page, where I had last left off reading from my book said:

“…favorite song lately, Hold You Down by DJ Khaled”

She then shockingly says, I work at DJ Khaled’s restaurant. Guys, this was no coincident that I end up sitting next to this lady with my birthday. This was another one of God’s orchestrated events to let me know, and hopefully you, that He is intimately involved in our lives. For me to have those words from my book on the screen in very BIG font for her to see that DJ Khaled out of all the books on my phone and of all pages of my very wordy 365-day devotional was once again everything lining up EXTREMELY too perfectly to be some random occurrence. It was God revealing His invisible Presence with us. THE GOD PERSPECTIVE CHANGES EVERYTHING!!!

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“ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT ME DRIVING?”

That was my daughter, Ember, yesterday as she drove us somewhere. I said, “No, I remember what God said to us when we were debating whether or not to leave Nigeria in our kids’ devotional: “No matter where you go, God will be with you.” That right there, KNOWING that God is always with my kids, even when I’m not, has given me such peace. We’re not going through life alone; God’s invisible Presence is always with us.

Are you feeling His closeness? That’s my assignment from Him, to share with you my experiences so you begin to feel Him as you go through your life. Like yesterday, sitting on a little stool in our bathroom, He showed up. I decided to chat with and encourage a friend who has gone through a crushing failure recently. I typed, “F.A.I.L. – “For Another Important Lesson.” I shared how a mistake I made the other day has been so good for me because I’ve learned that instead of rushing in to do things on my own, I need to slow down my roll and check in with God first – ‘God, what would You have me to do here?’ Right after that conversation, still sitting there, I decided to have a short appointment with God, and I unbelievably and randomly opened to this as if God was speaking to me:

“It is through problems and failure, weakness and neediness, that you learn to rely on Me.” Wink! Wink!

That was no coincident, but God revealing His intimate Presence with me there, with an important message for my friend after that disappointing defeat:

“Thus begins your journey of profound reliance on Me. It is a faith-walk, taken one step at a time, leaning on Me, as much as you need. This is not a path of continual success, BUT OF MULTIPLE FAILURES. However, each failure is followed by a growth spurt, nourished by increased reliance on Me. Enjoy the blessedness of a victorious life through deepening your dependence on Me… The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Jesus Calling

Notice the sweetness of God and how He comes to us amid life’s messiness. To be honest with you, I don’t know if my friend really believed this was a message from God, but I did. God has spoken to me so many times through this book that I have no doubt this was Him. Through our alone times, I’ve gotten to learn His cool and down to earth personality – He shows up in my bathroom! LOL! This gives me such confidence in knowing that He is my personal Protector, Adviser, Counselor, Friend, and Father, who is always with me.

Are you getting to know Him? I loved listening to the “Bible” app with my husband yesterday. To hear him so excited to share his alone time with God made this God geek wife super happy.

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