GOD, I’M SO ASHAMED

‘God, what is wrong with me? I should be better than this.’ That was me to Him yesterday evening, again sitting in my closet/office having an alone time with Him. I felt embarrassed about holding on to a hurt for a little too long that I kept crying to Him about, feeling so silly.

Fast forward a few hours later, He replied through Dr. Wayne Dyer when he quoted this Rumi poem:

“The Water said to the dirty one, “Come here.”The dirty one said, “I am too ashamed.”The water replied, “How will your shame be washed away without me?”

Dr. Dyer explained that the “Water” represents God, and it is Him saying, “How will your shame be washed away without me. In other words, the only way you can get rid of the stuff that’s not working for you, the pain that you have, the struggle you have, is when you go to your Source.”

See how God comes and stoops to our level once we invite Him to be apart of our lives. Like He just came and sat with me, “Nik, I’m the water that washes away all your dirt. You coming to me in your painful and struggling moments is how we get rid of them together. I’m the best option to help you with those things.”

My meditation book, Jesus As Friend, also had this to say to me:

“And not just accepting the humiliation, but loving it – loving our own wretchedness and thanking the Lord for letting us really know ourselves… the goodness and Providence of God want us there so we mature and become more united to Him.”

This is exactly what has happened. I got an opportunity to examine some craziness I’ve been dealing with for a long time now, and most importantly, it got me closer to God as He helped me to mature and become the Nik He would have me to be. Heehaw! Thanks, Water! I feel like David in Psalm 73:“When I was beleaguered and bitter,
totally consumed by envy,

I was totally ignorant, a dumb ox
in your very presence.
I’m still in your presence,
but you’ve taken my hand.
You wisely and tenderly lead me,and then you bless me.”

Thank You, God, once again for Your guidance and for being the water that washes away all our dirt and help us to become better. Amen.

WEROLLWITHGOD.COM

A GREAT GOOD FRIDAY

‘Ok, God. Enough. I’m tired of feeling sad. Help me out here.’ That was me on Good Friday, locking myself up in an office/closet to have some quiet time with Him. And let me tell ya, He showed up. There was a chapter in one of my meditation books about the crosses God asks us to continue carrying from Jesus:

“What then will the cross be for us? Look: what do you find most difficult in your everyday life? Well, that’s the Redeemer’s cross for you. Those tough temptations you meet, your ill health, your heavy demanding work, the defects of the people among whom you live, WHO HURT YOU…. Have supernatural outlook! All this, for you, is the cross of Christ…Carry it joyfully, lovingly. Carry it generously and you will learn to hide it from those around you, as you would hide a treasure. Hide it behind a generous smile and you will discover in the depths of your soul, what our Lord’s words mean when he says, ‘My yoke is easy and my burden is light’ (Mt 11:30); for he, the good Cyrenean of souls will help you carry it.” – Jesus As Friend by Salvatore Canals

Reading those three words, “Who hurt you,” was God speaking to me. I then looked up from that book to see the picture I’m holding in my hands of Jesus carrying his cross, and I instantly got the message: Nik, this hurt is the cross I’m asking you to carry for me. I brought this picture of Jesus all the way from Nigeria and I had placed it in this office/closet as a constant reminder that I’m going to joyously continue carrying the cross from Jesus. And on Good Friday, when, historically, Jesus carried his cross thousands of yeas ago, God was personally asking me to carry this one. No problem, God, anything for You. I will happily and joyously carry it. Especially after talking to my brother who said my cross is nothing compared to the crosses others have to carry. I’ll take my spec of a cross any day any time! (SMILE) What’s your cross?

What made it a great Good Friday though was calling my sister in the Bahamas earlier that day to vent to her. She was just talking to her son about a book, ‘Man’s Search For Meaning,’ by Victor Frankl, but hung up from him to talk to me. We ended up talking about the book as well about how he believed that we can find beauty in any situation we find ourselves. I told her maybe I need to read it. Fast forward to that evening, my mom asked to listen to Wayne Dyer’s podcast and exactly where we continued playing from where we had last left over, out of hundreds of episodes, this very one was about this very book, ‘A Man’s Search For Meaning,’ and him meeting Mr. Frankl years ago. Wink! Wink!

This again lined up too perfectly to just be some regular coincident. It was another one of my God winks where he orchestrated this entire thing to let His girl here know He was with her and to let you know, too, His Presence is with all of us. I’m just the God maniac here who pays attention. Relax…

WEROLLWITHGOD.COM