That was the question asked in one of my Facebook groups this morning. My response was this:
“I think you just have to forget about this infidelity issue in marriage just for peace to reign in our homes. Pretend you didn’t see what you see or hear what you hear, and keep your family happy and together for the glory of God. Learn to be wise and silent. Leave people to change on their own.”
An admin then wrote this: “I’m not sure what you are referring to. Are you saying if infidelity happens in marriage, a couple should not deal with it?”
Me: “I’m saying deal with it a wiser way. This infidelity issue is something that has been with us and will always be with us. I feel as women, we have a special role from God to keep our homes happy and together (the glue). In fact, after writing that comment, this showed up in my appointment with God:
“When the cross part of the marriage shows its ugly head, I have decided to lovingly and joyfully carry it for God. That means being silent and pretending I don’t see what I see or hear what I hear, overlooking 10,000 of hubby’s faults because God overlooks 10,001 of my own. If I have to be the peacemaker and glue holding my family together, no problem!”
The crazy thing was that I just had finished my appointment with God under our tree together and had continued back on my way home. My phone’s alarm alerted me that it was time for my 12 pm appointment with Him, so I went to page 12 of our family’s website. That message repeating exactly what I had written to the group in response to that question was God Himself getting involved with that conversation. No coincidence! God designed these men, so He knows best how to deal with them! (LOL!!)
I feel it’s time for us to evolve as women and stop allowing this infidelity issue to destroy our homes and our peace and joy. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but it isn’t going anywhere. It is what it is, folks! I love a conversation with my daughter, Ember, recently. She was talking to a Muslim friend who goes to the same university as her. She asked him about having more than one wife. He responded (and I totally agree!), “That’s all men. It’s only that my religion allows for it.”
Super difficult assignment/role we have from God as women, but we do it for God and our family. Like yesterday, I had the best day with my son, Emmie, at work, even though we fought most of it. We ended up spending hours in a store buying a treadmill, and I told him that this treadmill was what I needed to train myself like an athlete every day so that I can show up as the best wife, mom, and person. For me, that means being Tom Brady and Mike Tyson in one, doing whatever I have to do for my family to stay on God’s paths for our lives. If that means taking 10,000 punches for the team and being silent about it, I do what I gotta do, and I keep going.
“You have kids,” was again the vital statement from our friend, Ceri. I needed the treadmill to get out earlier to work, and I didn’t feel comfortable going out running in the dark. My hardworking husband has totally spoilt me, so now I’m trying to set a better example to our kids about having a solid work ethic. With two daughters in university in New York, momma gotta step up her game in helping hubby with our businesses, not letting the WEEDS overshadow the WHEAT and distract me. My eyes are on God’s prize for my family! Superhero wife, mom, and person, all for the glory of God! Like Ceri has also taught me, “You have to let go and give God the opportunity to be God.” I just show up as my most loving, patient, and excellent self, allowing God to fight on my behalf. Wink! Wink!
“I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13